A Sleeping Lover

by Lara Wilson

Sawyer watches Juliet sleep and gently strokes a stray hair from her cheek. A warm breeze blows in the window of their bedroom, bringing with it the faint scent of salt and sea.

He's grown used to it.

He's not sure he'll ever grow used to having this woman in his bed, his life, his heart.

That she loves him back is what really amazes him.

He's had many women in his life. Most he's used, a few he's cared for, but he can't say he's loved any of them.

Not even Kate.

There's a pang of regret as an image of Kate flickers through his mind, and his fingers still on Juliet's shoulder then begin rubbing slowly.

Kate was wild passion and desperate need and too familiar.

She was him with long, dark hair and tits.

They were drawn together and repulsed at the same time.

Sawyer knows now that they never would have worked. When he jumped from the helicopter he truly believed he loved her, but the last three years with Juliet have shown him that, while it might have been love, it wouldn't have lasted. It was real but not reality.

Reality is holding your lover's hair out of her face as she's sick with the flu. It's burning the toast and laughing over morning coffee. It's coming home to the comfort that someone is waiting for you. It's taking out the garbage and watching as she changes the sheets. It's...nice.

And sometimes it's not. Love is bitterness and fights and silly bickering and storming out.

But no matter how far you go, you always come back.

That's love.

And, that's Juliet.

Sawyer knows she was developing feelings for Jack, just as he loved Kate, but he's not bothered by that. He never has been. And it's not that they're both second best for the other. It's never been that, either.

She and Jack wouldn't have worked either. Maybe for different reasons than he and Kate, but the end would have been the same.

If they hadn't been stranded back in time together, Juliet might never have come to him one night with a bottle of Dharma wine and a Beatles album, a slightly lonely smile on her face.

They might never have gotten together.

For that reason alone, he thanks god that they did wind up here, despite how crazy it all is.

Sawyer's not sure what his life would be like without Juliet.

He hopes she feels the same way.

He's pretty sure she does.


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